I am finally done with all that work load on my hands. I'm barely breathing, well lucky that I am still breathing.

I am going to talk about myself in this post, as I have sort of gain enlightenment.

I have realised that not knowing what you do not know is the greatest sin to man, or rather one who does not know what he does not know is the greatest fool. One who knows what he does not know and choose not to do anything is the second greatest fool. And one who knows everything is the next fool after the two. I have been failing to understand what I don't know and was unable to find the solution to it. I soon realised the reason behind it. I have never failed a single paper before till this year (except for that one in p5 for maths), and so I became satisfied with what I have, not being able to fail. I never knew what I lost or rather what I do not know as a I result of that. I never understood the idea of working hard all this while, taking every test like with near empty information. I took it as a take and go, and took whatever that comes empty-handed. Every challenge became like a knife thrown by the teachers and soon I began to grab them by the blade and got scared on the hand.

But most important is that I seem to be not able to know what I do not know. It came to me as more of a chore than anything. I seriously have difficulty finding out what I do not know even with much effort. I knew that this might have been what Mdm Yaw was talking about all long, and tried hard to figure what I do not know, but most of the times it was rather futile. And soon came to me that only by blindly taking the knife by the blade would I find out what I do not know.

"A cup filled with water, can no longer be filled with anymore water, and that the only way was to pour the contents away for the new." That might all so have been a reason for my results in the Sciences. As they are the only subjects that I am having problems with.

I have lost that strong interests I had in Physics and Chemistry was never something I had great interests in. Every Chemistry lesson seems to be more of a chore than anything. Something like being forced to listen, to study it for the sake of studying.

A solution to that might be to do what I did nearly 3 years ago. I took up reading on Physics and Mathematics in thought that it would do my sciences good. And it did, but it didn't last as long as I thought it would.

The self-discpline I have over my studies aint good at all too. The seek for a solution to this became a challenge for me. A knife thrown at me, I could choose to avoid it, to catch it by its blade and take it brutally, or to catch it by the handle and make good use of it.

To be ignorance is bliss only when you know what you are ignorant of, or so I believe.